Hi again – it’s been a while since I posted an update. A lot has happened, so I’ll do a brief recap of each one.
Christmas Eve — I went out alone (what? how?). I’m Jewish and I found out a few days before that there is something called a Matzo Ball where a good number of people show up at the bar / club and have a great time. So I went there alone with 0 expectations, but ended up having tons of fun. I approached a half dozen groups at least and made friends with everyone. I was talking to this girl for a while, but then walked away to get some water. When I came back, she was dancing with this guy and then made out with him…. I get into a bad frame of mind and actually leave the club to go home. I get 3 blocks away. Stop. Turn around and go back inside. I walk past the girl who was still dancing with the guy. I made eye contact with her, and I could tell something was off. Then I pulled the ballsiest move of my entire life. I walked over to the guy, tapped him on the shoulder, introduced myself and shook his hand. He just ‘knew’ …and walked off. The girl tells me, “You just saved me so much, you have no idea.” …I never felt more confident in my life. We kissed. She lives 500 miles away so I never saw her again.
New Years Eve — I really liked this girl a lot 2 years ago. Big crush on her. I did what every Forever Alone Guy does and after six months I told her how I really felt about her (by the way, unloading your feelings on her like this rarely, if ever works, and is described in the book in Step 1 as a self-sabotage technique). She responds verbatim, “You’ll get over it.”
Rarely speak to her, if at all, for 18 months. Fast forward to New Years Eve. She is there. I’m at a point in my life where I’ve never been more confident or socially intuitive, so I felt comfortable talking to her. We both acknowledge we’re still single. We catch up a little bit and talk. The party goes on and every now and then we’d run into each other and talk some more. It was a good time. Then it comes time for the ball drop and we’re just standing next to each other while everyone else has someone to kiss. When the ball drops, I just turn her around to face me, and we had an awesome kiss. We pause, look at each other, and then kiss again. We sat on the couch holding hands, leaning on each other and then we kissed again when I had to leave at the end of the night.
Again, I was just visiting NY, so nothing can happen as a result of this, but it felt great to overcome what was 2 years in the making.
Patriots vs. Broncos Playoff Game – Last night I went out alone (I try to make it a theme in many of my stories that going out alone is totally cool and you can still have a great night). So I show up at this bar and start talking to a bunch of the guys there. Real chill guys, we’re laughing and bonding over football (it’s a great way to get guy friends). The niners-saints game was awesome so everyone was talking about that. I got into a good frame of mind and was just enjoying myself and being social. A bunch of really pretty girls were there and somehow I managed to start conversations with them. I spoke to at least 3 pretty girls alone for 20 minutes each. I didn’t get any numbers, but that wasn’t my goal. I just wanted to be social and have a good time.
Night goes on, happy hour crowd files out, late night crowd arrives. I start a conversation with these three girls and one of them and I really hit it off. By this time in the night I was feeling extremely confident and talkative. Everything just felt very natural. I got her number, but it was getting late and I’d been there for 4+ hours. My leg was hurting and I just wanted to go home already so I told her I had to leave, but that I had to get a kiss first. She said no. So I said, “why not?” She responds, “Cause you’re being lame and leaving early!” with a playful face. I can tell she didn’t want me to leave. We kissed. I texted her when I got back and she wants to see me again! Who knows what’ll happen!
So that’s it! I hope these stories have inspired you to just go out and approach / meet people. It’s working for me and I know that eventually I’m going to get a girlfriend and not be alone anymore.Tweet