1) You must admit to, and acknowledge your NFA, and then identify specifically what it is, and commit to doing something about it NOW!
2) You have to determine, to the best of your ability, where the need came from
Go back and figure out the origin of the development of your need for approval
For me, I can still hear my mother saying when I was a kid:
“It’s not necessarily nice to be important, however it is always important to be nice
“Respect your elders”
“Get along well with everyone”
“It’s important to have many friends”
See it, hear it, feel it
3) Identify the situations where your NFA has a negative impact and define the consequences.
Now ask what the positive consequences would be if you behaved like you had NO NFA.
4) Develop positive affirmations for these situations, for example:
- Be challenging.
- Push her away a little.
- As long as I am worried about what girls think of me, I am owned by them – only when I do not require approval from them, will I own myself.
5) Your ability to overcome NFA will always be driven by your willingness to act as if you were not burdened.
- While the affirmations are important – these alone won’t get you there
- You must prove to yourself that you can actually do the behavior in specific situations, as if you had no NFA.
What are some of the origins for your needs for approval?Tweet