May 252014
 

If I possessed any social skill prior to my self-improvement, it was that I was a polite listener. But for some reason, this absolutely basic social skill eludes many people. People like talking about themselves and they enjoy sharing their stories — especially funny ones. Obviously. Okay, so what? Here’s the problem I’m noticing.

Either, me or someone else is telling a story…It’s obviously getting to the funny part or punch line. And someone just has to jump in and make a retarded prediction about what they’re about to say…

Contrived Example:

Person A: “I finally got to the center of the lake and threw my fishing line out as far as I could and –”

Person B: “Oh my God, a shark came out of nowhere!?”

Person A: “No, a –”

Person B: “A dog jumped in the lake?”

Person A: “Actually, –”

Person B: “The boat tipped over?!?!”

Please shut your mouth, Person B. Let them finish the story. Your needless interrupting is ruining the flow of the story and serves no purpose. It also shows that you are rude and would rather hear yourself speak than listen to the story. It makes the storyteller feel uncomfortable. Stop trying to predict what is going to happen and just let them speak.

Your job as the listener is to nod your head a few times to let them know they have your full attention and you are engaged in active listening. They will appreciate it, especially women.

The only things you should be saying when they are telling the story are, “What happened?”, “Why did that happen?”, “How did that make you feel?”, and “What are you going to do?” I swear to God, I can talk to a girl for 30 minutes with just saying shit like that. People will enjoy talking to you because you care about what they have to say. They will recognize you as a socially intuitive and intelligent guy and they won’t even know why.

When it’s your turn to tell your story, pay attention to how they are listening. Are they interrupting you, are they gazing away. Make little mental notes. A girl who is interested in you will be paying strict attention to everything you say.

Cheers,

~Shakedown

 

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